domingo, 17 de janeiro de 2010

ecco, as listas!

Stereotyping People by Their Favorite Author

J.D. Salinger
- Kids who don’t fit in (duh).

Stephenie Meyer
- People who type like this: OMG. Mah fAvvv

Chuck Klosterman - Boys who don’t read.

Chuck Palahniuk
- Boys who can’t read.

Leo Tolstoy
- Guys I want to date.

Fyodor Dostoevsky
- Guys I want to sleep with. (The difference between the two Russian authors lies in the fact that I think the Underground Man is sexier than Pierre Buzukhov).

David Foster Wallace
- Confirmed 90’s literati.

Jane Austen (or Bronte Sisters)
- Girls who made out with other girls in college when they were going through a “phase”.

Nathaniel Hawthorne
- People who used to sleep so heavy that they would pee their pants.

Charles Dickens
- Ninth graders who think they’re going to be authors someday but end up in marketing.

William Shakespeare
- People who like bondage.

Mark Twain
- Liars.

Edgar Allan Poe
- Men who live in their mother’s basements. Or goth seventh graders.

Dan Brown
- People who used to get lost in supermarkets when they were kids.

Sylvia Plath
- Girls who keep journals (too easy).

George Orwell
- Conspiracy theorists (too easy).

Aldous Huxley
- People who are bigger conspiracy theorists than Orwell fans.

Thomas Aquinas
- Premature ejaculators.

Thomas Pynchon
- People who used to be fans of J.D. Salinger.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez
- Men who can’t lie but will instead be silent if they know you don’t want to hear the truth.

Salman Rushdie
- People who google image search Padma Lakshmi late at night.

Albert Camus
- People who went to art school after “trying it out” at a public university.

James Joyce
- People who do not like John Cusack movies.

Oscar Wilde
- People who can’t resist anything. See also, people who claim they’re going to change but never do.

mais aqui.